I've thought about countless time on whether or not I should write a blog post about this ongoing journey of mine and my battle with loosing weight. As a matter of fact as I am writing this I am still having my reservations.
But I do feel I need this I need to write it out because I am overwhelmed and blogging has been a good way to clear out my thoughts about a lot of things.
I've always been a healthy kid but that was never been an issue since I remained active in sports and other activities. And I guess the constant bickering and jokes of being called fat/ big has sort of numbed me as time goes by. I've always felt good about myself until recently...
I have weighed my heaviest at 204 lbs. last February and it scared the sh*t out of me. When I was at work even running in short distances made me run out of breath (and as a OR Nurse running is a skill especially when obtaining emergency supplies). And even just talking for long periods I gasp for breath especially when I announce the patient safety checklist. It sucked and I got worried.
So I started my journey by doing calorie counting and easily in almost 2 months I lost 10 lbs. I was so happy and all those symptoms I felt went away. But I knew I still had a long way to go but then old habits started kicking in again especially when I had my vacation leave from work (this was around June)... I was a bum! I gained 4 lbs in a span of 10 days... it was ridiculous.
So that scared the sh*t out of me again since I really did not want to reach the 200 mark again. So I cut back on my eating and in 2 weeks time I lost all the pounds I gained so I am back to 194. I realized that it was not good enough to be "yo-yo-ing" my weight when just wanted to. I needed the commitment.
So I am glad to report that I have lost another 14 lbs which brings me to my current weight of 180 (i'm back to my weight circa 2010). I admit I still have a long way to go but I feel different and happy. I hope I get to stick with this until I reach my desired weight.
Its been challenging to food choices and exercise. But my motivation is different this time... I feel like I am doing this for myself as opposed to succumbing to the pressure of outside forces. I am slowly able to wear clothes that haven't been used for a long time. I can work more efficiently and without running out of breath. My scrubs are not as tight which is awesome!
Confidence is slowly moving up little by little. I am now adding gym time to my regimen to help me lose weight even more. And I find it good to have gym time as it clears my head and its a good ME time.
Oh and on a lighter note, I am starting to get sick of vegetables which is what I dominantly eat... so I am finding alternatives to spice things up... Broccoli is good but it is really gas forming... I have yet to try the mashed cauliflower... so if there are any suggestions please leave a comment :)
To all my family and friends thank you for your support... and I really want to make this work. I promised myself that this will be my year... so this will be my year!
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